

A mild-mannered secretary self-induces a massive yeast infection that ends up having a mind of its own. It becomes very politically savvy and starts plotting the death of the presidentsapos; former kindergarten teacher. However, the yeast infection (which we later learn is lovingly named "Betty Crocker") meets some fierce opposition in the form of a meth-addicted janitor (played by Helen Hunt). The janitor (named "Sal") learns of Bettyapos;s cunning plan and goes at every length to stop this assassination from taking place. The final scene is a epic battle between Betty and Sal, in which Betty utilizes her vast knowledge of Swiss Army Knives to fight off Sal, while Sal utilizes her vast knowledge of fine French pastries to fight off Betty. In the end, Sal emerges victorious and becomes a national hero but unfortunately passes away due to a massive yeast infection.
I wonder if any studio would dig this.
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